Navigating the Conversation: Addressing Playing Time Concerns with Your Football Manager
- Dr Paul McCarthy
- Jul 12
- 4 min read
Engaging in a conversation with your football manager about your lack of playing time can be intimidating, but it is a necessary step for your growth as an athlete. Whether you're a youth player, collegiate athlete, or a professional, being able to communicate your concerns assertively is essential. In this guide, we’ll explore effective ways to address your concerns respectfully and productively.
Understanding Your Position
Before approaching your manager, take some time to reflect on your performance and your role within the team. Ask yourself:
Have I been training consistently?
Am I meeting the fitness benchmarks required for play?
How have I contributed during practice sessions?
Consider keeping a training journal where you document your performance and feedback from coaches. For example, if you participated in 80% of training sessions in the past month and received positive feedback on your teamwork, this data can boost your confidence in the conversation.
Self-evaluation is crucial. It not only enhances your confidence but also shows your manager that you are taking responsibility for your development.
Choosing the Right Time and Place
Timing greatly impacts the outcome of your discussion. Look for moments when your manager is less busy and more open to conversation—right after practice is often a good time. For instance, if your manager has just wrapped up a successful training session, they are likely to be more receptive to discussing playing time.
Select a private setting for your discussion. This can be a quiet corner of the training facility or a coffee shop away from the field. Discussing your concerns in front of teammates can create unnecessary tension and may undermine your manager's authority.
Framing the Conversation
Once the time and place are set, initiate the conversation positively. You might say, "I really admire the way you’ve developed our team strategy this season." This sets a respectful tone.
When addressing your concerns, use "I" statements to focus on how you feel. For example, "I feel like I'm missing out on opportunities during games and would appreciate understanding how I can earn more playing time." This approach emphasizes your feelings without placing blame on your manager.
Listening Actively
After you’ve voiced your concerns, be ready to listen. Your manager will likely have insights about your training performance or the roles played during matches. For instance, they may highlight that your fitness level is not quite at the standard required for starting positions.
Show that you are receptive by nodding and responding with phrases like "I see" or "That makes sense." Active listening promotes a better exchange and shows respect for their perspective.
Seeking Constructive Feedback
Don’t shy away from asking for actionable feedback. This can reveal areas for improvement and demonstrate your commitment. Use questions like:
"What specific areas can I enhance to increase my playing opportunities?"
"Are there drills or skills you believe I should focus on?"
For instance, if your manager suggests working on your passing accuracy, you could create a practice plan that includes targeted drills over the next several weeks, which may include doing 100 passing repetitions during training.
By seeking actionable advice, you position yourself for growth and strengthen your working relationship with your manager.
Setting Future Goals
Once you’ve gathered feedback, collaborate with your manager to establish achievable goals. These goals can include skill enhancements, specific training focuses, or feedback sessions. Setting measurable targets helps hold you and your manager accountable.
A potential goal could be, "I want to improve my stamina and can we do endurance drills in next week’s training?" This indicates your readiness to work hard and keep the manager involved in your development.
Expressing Gratitude
Always remember to express gratitude at the end of the conversation. Thanking your manager for their time and insights fosters a positive environment for future discussions. A simple acknowledgment like, "Thank you for helping me understand what I need to work on" makes a lasting impression and shows your respect for their role.
Reflecting on the Conversation
After the conversation, take time to process the feedback you received. Consider how you can apply their suggestions to your training. Writing down the points you discussed can help solidify your understanding and keep you motivated.
Engaging a trusted teammate in a discussion about these insights can further clarify your path forward. Reflecting on the advice can ease any frustrations and guide your focus as you work toward increased playing time.
Wrapping It Up Playing Time Concerns
Addressing playing time concerns with your football manager is a challenging yet essential conversation. Approaching the issue with respect and preparedness can lead to productive results.
By preparing well, actively listening, soliciting constructive feedback, and expressing gratitude, you can create a meaningful dialogue that benefits not just you, but the entire team. Maintain that open line of communication to enrich your experience as a player.

With clarity and confidence, you can ensure that your concerns are heard and addressed, paving the way for improved performance and increased playing time in upcoming games.